Staying in the room with a scared patient, not rushing to fill the quiet, takes more nerve than talking ever did.

Talking is often what we do to manage our own discomfort rather than somebody else’s. Filling a quiet room gives you something to do with the awkwardness, and it quietly tells the frightened person that their fear needs covering up. Staying still is harder precisely because nothing is happening to distract you from what they are feeling. Presence is the thing being offered, not words.

The next time someone near you is frightened or upset, try staying and saying nothing for a while. Let them break the silence if they want it broken.