Telling your best friend that their new boyfriend scares you is one of the riskiest kind things you’ll do.

Warning a friend about somebody they are happy with risks the friendship, and that risk is real, because people often defend the relationship and resent the messenger. It is also one of the kindest hard things you can do. Said once and clearly, it gives them something to hold onto later if they ever need it, even if they cannot use it now. Silence protects you and leaves them with nothing.

Describe what you saw rather than what kind of person he is. Say you are not going anywhere, then let them decide and keep answering the phone.