You’ll forgive your parents more easily once you realize they were also doing this for the first time.

Your parents were improvising. Everything they got wrong with you, they got wrong at an age not far from the one you are heading into, with no previous attempt to learn from and nobody checking their work. That is not an excuse for the worst of it, and some of it genuinely was not acceptable. It does explain a great deal of the ordinary failure, and it makes them people rather than a verdict.

If it helps, ask one of them this week what they were worried about when you were small. Just listen to the answer.