People often match the energy you bring. If everyone seems cold, check the temperature you walked in with.

Rooms respond: walk in braced for indifference and you will give off exactly that, and people will quite reasonably mirror it back, at which point you have your proof. You are rarely a neutral observer of a room’s mood, because you are part of what makes it. That works in your favour as often as against it.

Run the test this week on a group where you usually feel unwelcome. Go in with one open thing: a greeting, a question, an undefended face. Give it two attempts, because once is not a sample. If it is genuinely cold both times, that is useful to know and not your fault.