One day you’ll notice your mom laughing with her friends and realize she had a whole life before you.

You meet your parents already in a role, and for years that role is all you can see of them. Then you catch one of them laughing with people who knew them at nineteen, and the shape of a whole separate life becomes briefly visible. None of it was hidden; you had no way to see past the part that belongs to you.

Ask about that life this week while it is easy to ask. One question about a photo, a friend, a job they had at your age. Let the answer run long and resist turning it back to yourself. You will have the story later.