When a secret gets out, the leak started with whoever told the first person. Sometimes that’s you.

Every leak has a first link. The story about how it got out usually focuses on the person who posted it, but the chain started earlier, with somebody who told one trusted person and considered that private. One is all it takes, because the second person never agreed to the terms. The honest question is whether you were ever that first link.

Treat telling one person as telling everybody, because functionally it is. If you need to talk about something that is not yours, talk about it without the names. And if you did start one, say so to the person it belonged to before they work it out.