If something keeps bothering you and you never say so, you’re not being nice. You’re being unclear.

Silence reads as agreement to everyone except you. The other person carries on, not out of disrespect but because nothing has ever told them to stop, while you keep a running tally they do not know exists. By the time it comes out, it arrives as a long list, and they are baffled rather than sorry.

Say it early, small, and once. One sentence about one instance, close to when it happens, with no history attached. It feels like making a fuss and it is the version that protects the friendship.