“I was just joking” after the joke didn’t land is a retreat, not an explanation.

Reaching for the joke defense is an attempt to undo the moment without admitting there was one. Everyone can hear the difference, because the retreat only arrives after the face across from you changes. The trouble is that it asks the other person to pretend along with you. What they heard does not get unsaid by reclassifying it.

If a line of yours lands badly this week, try the slower move: say you got it wrong and leave the explanation out. One sentence, no defense of your intent. If that cover shows up often, ask what you keep almost saying on purpose.