A family visit goes better when nobody arrives expecting old roles to assign the whole day.

Families keep a cast list from years ago, and walking through the door can quietly reassign it. The responsible one, the helpless one, the peacemaker, the difficult one: these were fitted to people who no longer exist in quite that form, but they are comfortable and they resume by themselves. Everyone then behaves as expected, which confirms the roles, and the visit becomes a rerun. Most family friction is casting rather than conflict.

Go into the next visit having decided one thing you will do differently from your old part. Let other people surprise you, and notice when you are writing their lines for them.