Keep family help separate from the right to make someone else’s decisions.

Generosity inside a family can quietly turn into leverage. Money, childcare, a spare room or practical support get given freely, and then a preference about how the other person should live arrives attached to them, sometimes without anyone naming the connection. The help was real; the entitlement that grew alongside it was invented. Being able to assist someone does not make you a better judge of their life.

If you give help, say plainly that it comes with no conditions and mean it. If you receive it, thank them warmly and keep the decision where it belongs.