Some closeness is simply knowing when a person wants an answer and when they want a witness.

Two very different requests can sound identical. One asks for a solution, the other asks for someone to stay in the room while it is hard. Answering the second with advice feels like being hurried past your own feeling, and offering sympathy when a decision is needed feels like being left alone with it. Telling them apart usually means asking.

Try one sentence at the start: would you like help thinking, or would you rather I listen. Most people will tell you, and most are relieved to be asked.