A relative’s different pace does not make their milestones less worthy of celebration.

Families keep a rough timetable and quietly grade people against it. When someone reaches a thing later, or reaches a different thing entirely, the achievement gets marked with a softer sort of congratulation, as though it counted for less because of when it arrived. What was hard for that person is what deserves celebrating, not what would have been hard for you.

Think of a relative whose path has looked slower or sideways. Mark their next step the way you would mark anyone’s, with the same phone call and the same cake. Say specifically what you admire about how they got there.