Patience lets people reveal themselves without interrogation.

People show you who they are over time and under ordinary conditions, not under questioning. Pressing for declarations produces performances, because anyone can say the right thing when asked directly. Patience gets you the more useful evidence: what someone does across months when nothing is being demanded.

Rather than seeking reassurance about someone, watch how they behave when it costs them something. How they treat people who cannot help them. Whether small promises hold. This takes longer than asking, and it gives you an answer you can actually rely on rather than one you had to request.