A favor can feel larger when it arrives before you have found a comfortable way to ask.

Asking is often the hardest part, and it costs more than the help itself. Someone who acts before the request has been made spares you the whole business of finding words, choosing a moment and deciding whether you are allowed to need this. That is why unasked help can land so heavily, in the good sense.

Look for the person near you who has clearly been struggling to ask. Do the specific thing rather than offering to help in general. Keep it small enough that no debt comes with it.