The child who made less trouble may have had needs nobody learned to hear.

Attention in a busy household follows noise, because noise is what asks. A child who managed, who did not complain, offers no signal that anyone has been trained to read, and their needs go unmet without anyone deciding to neglect them. Years later, that person may still find it difficult to say what they want, having learned early that wanting had to be small. None of that was their doing.

Where this describes you, it may help to practise asking for something ordinary and unnecessary. If it describes someone you know, do not wait to be told. Ask directly, and give the answer room to be slow.