The rulebook becomes interesting when the advantage changes hands.

Rules stay invisible to whoever they happen to suit. While things run your way the details look like background, and the moment the advantage moves you discover a sudden appetite for precise definitions and exact wording. That is not hypocrisy so much as attention arriving late. Interest in fairness tends to wake up exactly when fairness stops being convenient.

When you find yourself reaching for the rules, ask whether you would want that reading applied if the positions were swapped. The honest answer usually settles whether you are defending fairness or defending yourself.