The person who remembers every slight may be forgetting every quiet repair.

Injuries stay in memory more reliably than mending does. A slight arrives sharply and gets filed with the date attached, while the apology delivered awkwardly, the extra effort made afterwards, the thing quietly put right without discussion, all fade because nothing about them demanded attention. The resulting ledger looks accurate and is missing one whole column. That is how a relationship can feel worse than it has actually been.

If you are holding a list about someone, try writing the other column beside it. You may find the account more balanced than the version you have been carrying.