Children hear the difference between being corrected and being made inconvenient.

Children are very good at telling why they are being told off. A correction about the thing they did sounds different from irritation about how their existence has interrupted your afternoon, and the second one teaches them that they are a nuisance rather than that the behaviour was wrong. Tone carries the message even when the words are reasonable.

When you feel the sharpness rising, name the actual problem out loud to yourself first: the noise, the mess, the timing, your own tiredness. Then correct the specific thing and stop. If the sharpness was really about your day, say so afterwards, briefly and without a speech.