You can spend years protecting an identity that took one bad season to create.

A hard stretch of life can hand you a conclusion about yourself, and the conclusion outlives the stretch by decades. What was accurate about a scared twenty-year-old in one bad year becomes the permanent story you defend at forty, complete with evidence, habits, and explanations. The season ended a long time ago. The identity it created is still on duty.

Trace one belief about yourself back to when it started. If it began in a specific difficult period, ask whether it was ever a description of you or only a description of that period. Then check whether the conditions that made it true are still anywhere in your life.