Discretion of speech is more than eloquence; and to speak agreeably to him with whom we deal is more than to speak in good words or in good order.

Knowing what to say to this particular person beats saying it beautifully. A well-built argument delivered to someone who is not ready for it, or in language that belongs to your world and not theirs, fails while sounding excellent. The skill that actually moves things is the unglamorous one: judging what this listener can hear, and leaving out what would only have shown how well you can talk.

Before the conversation that matters this week, spend two minutes on the other person rather than on your case. Ask what they are worried about and what words they would use, and build the first sentence out of that.