You can’t order remembrance out of the mind; and a wrong that was a wrong yesterday must be a wrong to-morrow.

Memory does not take instructions. Telling yourself to move on, or being told to, does nothing to the fact that something happened and was wrong. This is worth knowing because a great deal of advice about letting go quietly asks you to pretend. Forgiveness, if it comes, is a decision about what you will do next, not an agreement that the thing was acceptable.

If you are carrying an old injury, you can stop trying to talk yourself out of remembering it. Name it accurately, at least to yourself. Then decide separately what you want your relationship with that person to be now.