In conversation, humor is worth more than wit and easiness more than knowledge.

Wit wins an exchange and warmth opens it, and those are not the same result. A clever remark makes someone admire you and guard themselves slightly; a good-natured one makes them relax and say more. Knowing things works the same way, since being well informed matters less to the person across from you than being easy to sit with. People remember how a conversation felt long after they forget what was in it.

In your next conversation, resist the sharpest line that occurs to you and ask a question instead. Notice how much more arrives when nothing is being scored.