When marrying, ask yourself this question: Do you believe that you will be able to converse well with this person into your old age? Everything else in marriage is transitory.

Looks fade, circumstances change, and passion rises and falls, but conversation is the thing you do every day for decades. Choosing a partner by attraction or by the shape of a shared plan is choosing by what will not last. The real test is whether talking to this person is still interesting when nothing exciting is happening.

Notice how an ordinary evening feels with someone, not a memorable one. Can you sit together and stay curious, disagree without damage, come back to a subject a week later? If the answer is yes, most of the rest can be survived.