Blaming someone else doesn’t erase the consequence. It just delays the lesson.

Blame is comfortable because it is often partly accurate. Somebody else really did contribute, and pointing at them is a real explanation. What it cannot do is change the outcome, which is sitting in your life regardless of who caused it, and every hour spent on the attribution is an hour not spent on your part of the fix.

Try separating the two questions. Whose fault it was can be true and still useless. Ask what portion was yours, however small, because that portion is the only piece you can do anything with.