When someone is yelling, listen for what they’re scared of. It’s usually hiding right under the volume.

Volume is a symptom rather than a message. Underneath most shouting is something more specific and less impressive: being scared of losing something, of being embarrassed, of not being listened to. The noise is the packaging, and arguing with packaging goes nowhere, because you are answering the wrong thing.

This is not a reason to stay somewhere unsafe. If you are safe and it is worth it, try naming the thing underneath instead of matching their volume. Getting it roughly right usually drops the temperature immediately.