Don’t tell someone else’s story for them. Ask first, even when you’re on their side.

Even a story told in defense of someone takes the telling out of their hands. They may not be ready, they may have a different version, or they may simply want the choice about who knows. Being on their side does not transfer ownership to you. The information was lent, not given.

If you are about to mention something personal about a friend, ask them first, even mid conversation. A quick can I tell them this keeps the trust intact and takes four seconds.