Stop demanding anonymity and recognition simultaneously.

Wanting to be known and wanting to stay hidden are both legitimate, and holding them at once produces a particular kind of frustration. You end up resenting an obscurity you are also actively maintaining. Naming which one you actually want makes the tension resolvable.

Ask yourself honestly which you would choose if you could only have one. If it is recognition, accept the exposure that comes with it. If it is privacy, let go of the grievance about not being noticed.