God reads your search history and still calls you His. Let that humble you and free you.

Being fully known and still claimed is the part most people cannot hold together. You assume that if anyone saw the whole picture the welcome would be withdrawn. God is already looking at the unedited file and has not changed His mind about you. That should knock the pride out and take the fear with it.

Stop performing for someone who already has the full record. Say the thing you have been keeping back, in prayer first, and then to one person you trust. The relief on the other side of that is usually larger than the shame was.