The version of you that shows up after the hard conversation is always lighter.

Avoiding a conversation does not remove it. It keeps running in the background, using energy you do not notice until it stops, which is why the relief afterward is usually out of proportion to how the talk actually went. Most of the weight was the anticipation, not the content. Even a conversation that goes badly ends the carrying.

Write the first sentence down before you have it, since the opening is the hard part. Pick a time when neither of you is exhausted. Say the true thing plainly and let the other person respond without being managed.