Anyone will come to the party. Keep the ones who show up on moving day.

Turnout for the fun thing tells you almost nothing. Free food and good company draw a crowd, and nobody in it had to weigh whether you were worth their Saturday. The list gets very short once there is lifting involved, or a long drive, or somebody who needs collecting at midnight. That short list is your actual circle, and it is rarely who you would have guessed.

After the next time you need help, notice quietly who appeared. Then get yourself onto somebody else’s short list. Offer before they ask, because asking is the part most people cannot do.