You don’t have to agree with someone to understand them. Understanding is how you argue with the real point, not a cartoon of it.
LEADERSHIP
WHAT THIS MEANS
Understanding is often avoided because it feels like conceding, and it is not. You can reconstruct someone’s reasoning in full and still think it is wrong, and doing so is the only way to argue with what they actually hold rather than a simpler version that is easier to beat. The simpler version is comfortable and useless. Beating it changes nobody’s mind, including your own.
Before disagreeing, try stating their case in a way they would sign off on. If you cannot, you have found the homework. Then argue with the strongest version, which is the only one worth your time.
A QUESTION TO SIT WITH
Whose position have you argued against without ever really learning it?
MORE IN LEADERSHIP & INFLUENCE
- Say “this paragraph is confusing,” not “you’re a bad writer.” One helps them fix it. The other just makes them quit.
- Most resentment starts with an expectation nobody said out loud. Say it early and you won’t have to fight about it…
- A captain who says “that one’s on me” gives the whole team permission to own their mistakes too.
Free, with nothing to buy inside it.