You can’t read the label from inside the jar. That’s why outside eyes are worth listening to.

Your view of yourself is assembled entirely from the inside, which makes it detailed and badly positioned. You know every intention and almost none of the effects, while other people see the effects and none of the intentions. Both accounts are partial, and yours is the one you cannot step outside.

Ask someone you trust what it is like to be around you, and then say nothing for a while. Resist explaining what you meant, since you already know that part. Take what lands as data rather than verdict, and notice which comment you most wanted to argue with.