When you pay for it, you get a vote. When someone else pays, you get opinions attached.

Money carries influence whether or not anybody intends it to, and help usually arrives with an unstated interest in how it gets used. That is not a scandal, only ordinary human nature. The cost of accepting tends to be paid in say rather than in dollars.

Before taking help, work out what the giver will expect and whether you can live with it. Sometimes the answer is yes and that is perfectly fine. Where you want the decision entirely to yourself, fund the smaller version instead and keep the vote.