Every argument has two director’s cuts, and each one stars a different hero.

Both people in a fight are working from a version of events in which they were reasonable. This is not dishonesty. Each of you has full access to your own intentions and only to the other’s behavior, so of course your reasons look better than theirs, and theirs look better to them for exactly the same reason.

The useful question is not who is right but what the other version actually says. Ask them to tell it without interrupting, and listen for where their account of your behavior surprises you. That surprise is the part you could never have found on your own.