Pick mentors by how they treat people when they’re stressed, not by how many followers they have.

Anybody can be decent on a good day. Character turns up on the bad ones, when the order is wrong, the bus is late, the team is losing and nobody is watching their manners. Somebody with a large audience has been rewarded mostly for how they look, which tells you very little about what you would learn standing next to them. The version of a person under pressure is the version you would eventually copy.

Watch one adult you admire through their worst half hour this week. Note what they do with their voice and their blame. If it holds up, ask them something.