Riding a horse for the first time means trusting something with a mind of its own. So does every relationship worth having.

Trust means the other side can make choices you do not control. A horse will spook, lean, or decide it has had enough, and no amount of care on your part removes that. If you could control it, what you had would be operation rather than trust. Every relationship worth having carries the same shape, which is why they cannot be made safe without being made small.

Notice where you are asking for a guarantee as the price of getting close to somebody. Then try giving a little of the thing you are waiting to be promised.