Being the person who asks “is everyone okay?” after something goes wrong takes more steadiness than you’d think.

When something goes wrong, most people freeze or start explaining. Checking on the people involved means stepping out of your own adrenaline and looking around, which is harder than it sounds in the first ten seconds. It also changes the room, because it tells everyone what matters first. Steadiness is something other people borrow from you.

You can build it in small messes before you need it in a big one. Next time a plan falls apart or someone takes a hard knock at practice, look at faces before fault. Ask the question out loud, even if an adult is already there.