Joy and happiness aren’t twins. You can have joy in a hospital waiting room.

Happiness responds to conditions and leaves when the conditions do. The other thing is sturdier and much less pleasant to describe, because it can coexist with a terrible afternoon. People in waiting rooms laugh sometimes, and it is not denial. It is the evidence that something underneath is not determined by the news.

Stop requiring yourself to feel good in order to be all right. On a bad day, look for the smaller durable thing: somebody beside you, a job you can do, food that tastes of something. Let that count without calling it happiness.