A crossing guard stops traffic with a clear signal and a bright vest, not strength. Clarity is authority.

Drivers stop for a crossing guard because the signal is unmistakable, not because anybody could be forced. A plain gesture and a visible position do what strength never could. The same holds in most groups: people follow instructions they understand immediately, and anything ambiguous gets read as optional. Being clear does most of the work that volume only pretends to do.

Take one instruction you give regularly and cut it to a single sentence somebody could act on without asking. Say it the same way every time. Then ask whether being ignored is about authority or about not being understood.