The meanest label you carry is usually one you repeat about yourself, not one anyone still says.

Labels usually outlive the people who handed them out. Somebody said something cutting once, perhaps years ago, and by now they have forgotten saying it while you have repeated it to yourself a few thousand times. At that point the original speaker is beside the point. You have become the one keeping the sentence in circulation.

Write the label down and ask when you last heard it from anybody else. If the answer is years, the voice is yours to retire. Try describing yourself in plain terms, as a friend would, and use that version instead.