Being the oldest means you’re the first draft of everything in your house. Be kind to yourself about the edits.
REFLECTION
WHAT THIS MEANS
Oldest children get parented by people who have never done it before, which means every rule was tested on you first and several of them were wrong. The curfews were stricter, the mistakes were newer, and your siblings now live under a version of the rules your experience quietly improved. None of that was your doing, and you carried the cost of it.
Go gently on yourself about the years when nobody in the house, parents included, knew what they were doing. The edits were never failures of yours.
A QUESTION TO SIT WITH
What did your family figure out by practising on you?
MORE IN MINDSET & IDENTITY
- “Mature for your age” sometimes means you had to grow up early. You’re still allowed to be a kid about some things.
- People who make fun of you for trying have often stopped trying themselves. Their laugh is about them.
- Not everyone who disagrees with you is your enemy. Some are just early or late to the same idea.
Free, with nothing to buy inside it.