Notice the small lies you tell to smooth things over. They show you exactly where you’re afraid of disappointing people.

Small untruths are not random, they cluster. Saying you are fine, saying you forgot, saying you are nearly there: each usually protects you from the same few reactions. That makes them a map rather than a character flaw. The person you lie to most smoothly is often the one whose disappointment you can least sit with.

Pay attention for a few days as the little ones leave your mouth, and note who was in the room each time. Then take the easiest one and try the plain version instead: you forgot, you would rather not, you are running late. It is usually smaller out loud than in your head.