Your values are what you’d still do if it cost you. Your preferences are everything else.

A value only shows itself when it is inconvenient. Anything you keep doing while it is free is a preference, and preferences are fine, but they say little about who you are under pressure. The test is cost: would you still say the thing, make the call, tell the truth, if it lost you the place or the friend or the money. Most people have fewer values and more preferences than they assume.

Name one of yours and find its price tag by remembering the last time keeping it cost you something. If no instance comes to mind, watch for the next one instead of concluding you have none.