Staying loyal to a friend doesn’t mean staying loyal to every plan you two made at fifteen.

Promises made at fifteen were made by two people who no longer exist in quite the same form. You both agreed to the same college, the same sport, the same town, based on guesses about who you would turn into. Keeping the person is the commitment; keeping the itinerary is not. Confusing the two is how friends end up resenting each other for growing.

If a plan has stopped fitting, say it early and say it directly to them, not to a mutual. Offer what you can still keep: the friendship, a visit, a call. Most people can handle a changed plan; what they struggle with is finding out late.