If they only hang out when nobody better is free, you’re the backup plan.

Last-minute invitations that only come when other options fall through are telling you about rank, not availability. Nobody says it out loud, and the pattern says it clearly enough: you are pleasant company and you are not the first call. Noticing that is not self-pity. It is accurate reading, and it lets you stop over-investing in somebody who has already decided where you sit.

Keep a rough count over a month of who initiates and when. Then put your free time where it is wanted, and say no to the eight o’clock Saturday text now and then. You will find out quickly whether they adjust or just find somebody else.