After a breakup, list what you’d do differently. If the list is empty, you’re not done thinking.

An empty list usually means the thinking is still at the stage of sorting out who was at fault. That stage is necessary and it is not the end, because even where most of it was not yours there will be something: a thing you ignored, a thing you never said, a point where you knew and stayed quiet. Finding it is for your benefit, not theirs.

Give it some time first, then write two or three honest items, small and specific rather than sweeping. Then put the list away. Its only job is to be in your head next time.