A compliment can unsettle you when it praises a quality you were trying to leave behind.

A compliment can land badly when it names something you are trying to leave. Being praised for reliability when you are trying to be less dutiful, or for toughness when you are trying to soften, confirms that the old version is what people still see. The kindness is real and it arrives as evidence against the change.

If a compliment sits oddly, notice what it says about how you are currently read. You can thank the person and still register the information. And it is worth telling someone close to you what you are trying to become, since otherwise they will keep praising the version they know.