An identity chosen freely can later become a rule you enforce against yourself.

You choose something freely, and then the choice becomes a standard you are held to, mostly by yourself. Having declared what you are, every departure now looks like inconsistency, and the freedom that made the choice possible quietly converts into an obligation to keep making it. The enforcement is internal, which makes it harder to notice and harder to appeal.

If a chosen identity has started issuing rules, ask which of them you would pick again today. Freely chosen things should stay revisable, and the fact that you made the choice does not put you in debt to it. Changing your mind about yourself is allowed more often than most people permit.