The person you were before a major event is also someone you know only through memory.

The person you were before it happened is now someone you only reach through memory, the same way you reach anyone else who is gone. You cannot ask them anything, cannot check what they thought, and the record you have of them is partial and revised. A major event can put a version of you on the other side of a line.

Be gentle with that earlier person rather than judging their choices from where you now stand. They did not have what you have. And if you can write down anything about how they saw things, do it, because that access will keep narrowing.