The same competitive instinct can look admirable in victory and unpleasant at a board game.

The same drive is called competitive spirit on a field and something less flattering at a kitchen table. Nothing about the person changes; the context decides whether the intensity is admired or found unpleasant. Traits are not judged in themselves but by their fit with the setting.

If you have been told you are too competitive, the useful question is where it lands well rather than how to have less of it. Find the arenas that want it. And if someone near you gets sharp over a board game, it may help to see it as an appetite that has nowhere better to go rather than as a statement about how they regard you.